Just Keep On Living
- Pat Kelsaw
- Feb 19, 2024
- 6 min read
Updated: Jul 31, 2024
Monday, February 19, 2024, marks a special day in my life. Born on this date, 100 years ago, was my late mother affectionately known by her family and close circle of friends as “Grammie” or simply by her initials “L.B.” This nickname had to grow on her. She was stubborn and indignant about it! Because it was coined by her granddaughter, her first born grandchild and only
granddaughter! In her mind, she didn’t think it reflected, a wholesome “grandmotherly” image that she wanted to portray; yet “L.B.” fit her, and it stuck! She finally accepted this fate and L.B. February 2012
began signing her cards and letters with those initials, “L.B.”
One of her favorite sayings was, "Just keep on living."
Lead Like Big Mama is named to honor the family matriarch, my mother’s mother - the
name her dozen or so (can’t recall exactly) grandchildren, including me, called her. During the fifties & sixties, when I was a little girl, growing up in the West Oakland projects, Big Momma made patchwork quilts by hand. Living in rural Arkansas, I remember my summer visits to her house when it had no indoor bathroom facilities. Wintertime it was always such a treat to get a huge cardboard box, covered with wrinkled brown paper bags taped together shipped from Big Momma’s hometown post office! In the box uncovered the
handstitched colorful quilts - a work of art. Many were made from remnants of clothing that my mom and I used to wear, along with other textures and fabrics. This was our Christmas gift, to help keep us warm (even though we lived in California, back in those days it never really got THAT cold). We’d repeat this ritual for years during my childhood, at least while Big Momma still had good eyesight and could stitch by hand. With each stitch, no doubt made with love, created an intricate patchwork of patterns and textures. Her quilts sometimes large enough to cover a king-sized bed, told a story or recalled a moment. This kept her busy as she lived a life of a “colored” woman in rural Arkansas. For generations of Black families, Big Momma, or Grandmother, Nana, Granny served as a major player in the family. There seemed to be some common personality traits of — intimidating looks and/or phrases but unconditionally loving, unsympathetic yet wildly cynical; and sometimes known for being inappropriate in the best ways … like asking personal questions or sharing some embarrassing story about you in front of “company”.
Having my Big Mama, for the most part, was a blessing. From my experience, I think that’s something that no matter what race or nationality you are, we can all agree on. But Black grandmothers have developed this whole persona, a playbook of character traits that they all went through a similar roadmap of life. A piece of wisdom that I have learned:
keep on learning. As you begin to age and if you have the openness, willingness, and ability, (along with faith - if that’s important to you along your own personal journey) you can learn to shift. You may do things differently, it may take you longer, you may outsource the service/need, you can even shift your thoughts and attitudes - find ways to adapt, grow, stretch, and heal from the family traumas and your other hurts. Sometimes shifting is like adapting from driving a car with automatic transmission to learning to drive a “stick shift” car, and then learning how to navigate not driving at all. No matter which one, you can continue to get where you need to go! Shifting is good; learning how to have goals, reassess them periodically and create your action plan(s) (in pencil) – it’s about
shifting.
March is Social Work Month! Make sure you become a Lead Like Big Mama subscriber!
The first webinar happens later next month! The webinar highlights my purposeful and
unpredictable life and career. I have dedicated almost a half-century to this profession – 40 years and counting. This new venture, Lead Like Big Mama allows me to continue my work and my “WHY” – just in a new way. And WHY do I continue to do the work that I do even now as I embark upon turning 70 in a few months? If football coaches are still working in their 70’s, then why can’t I continue to do what I love? I am working my way out of a job! There are so many milestones in this life to celebrate and I am inviting you to join me. I hope that Lead Like Big Mama brings a unique space and place for intergenerational learning, to dialogue, share collective knowledge and wisdom for the ages. No matter how old or how much I think I know, I want to remain teachable. Keep me open to learning from others - children to adults; from the simplest, to the simple-minded to the wisest. I am still learning that it is okay to be imperfect as you learn.
Speaking of intergenerational learning, I must give many thanks to my intergenerational family/team that brought this Baby Boomer’s vision to life to create this space. Much love and gratitude to my Millennial son for the clarity and accountability, my Generation X daughter with her keen wordsmithing skills when called upon even at the last minute; finally, my Generation Z grandson who built this site for me and learning valuable work skills along the way!
From Big Mama’s Playbook:
Learn about nonprofit management strategies and grant writing resources-
professional development trainings, calls for proposals and share your
knowledge, grant funding announcements, and employment opportunities.
In the recent past, I was able to network and share this information through individual
emails and text messages. As my network of former colleagues & students, current and
former clients have grown, along with the passing of time, Lead Like Big Mama provides
a new way to shift my communication strategy! It is my goal to provide the latest
information as I discover new items each week.
Grant News & Tips: Through Lead Like Big Mama, I am excited to bring you once
again several of my courses that focus on fundraising, and grant writing soon. You will
learn about basic nonprofit fundraising, the art & style of writing a successful grant and
how to prepare your organization, board, staff, stakeholders, and partners. Subscribe to
find out about upcoming offerings. Free and low-cost/affordable webinars!
Featured Grant Opportunities: This listing primarily focuses on regions of the country
and in communities: urban/suburban/rural where I have lived or worked, or other places
that touch my life – where I know people are working hard to make a difference. And
besides regional and state-specific grants, national and Federal grant opportunities
related to the health and well-being of communities and families will also be included in
this listing. Find grants in the following areas:
Arts/Culture:
South Carolina Arts Commission invites applications for school arts grants. Grants up to
$5,000.
Deadline: March 5, 2024
For complete program guidelines and application instructions for this request for
proposal (RFP), see the website.
Children/Youth:
New Mexico Children’s Foundation invites applications for programs that benefit
children. Grants awards up to $10,000.
Deadline: March 9, 2024
For complete program guidelines and application instructions for this request for
proposal (RFP), see the website.
Link to complete RFP
Foundation For The Carolinas invites applications for 2024 Longleaf Fund. Capital
grants of between $10,000 and $150,000 will be awarded to organizations serving at-
risk children/youth.
Deadline: March 7, 2024, at 2:00 p.m. ET
For complete program guidelines and application instructions for this request for
proposal (RFP), see the website.
Education:
First Nations Institute invites applications for Native Language Immersion Initiative.
Grants up to $75,000.
Deadline: March 4, 2024, at 5:00 p.m. MT
For complete program guidelines and application instructions for this request for
proposal (RFP), see the website.
Health:
Massage Therapy Foundation invites applications for MTF Community Service Grant.
Grants up to $5,000.
Deadline: March 1, 2024
For complete program guidelines and application instructions for this request for
proposal (RFP), see the website.
People with Disabilities:
Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation invites applications for Quality-of-Life Grants.
Grants from $5000 - $24,999 will be awarded.
Deadline: March 8, 2024
For complete program guidelines and application instructions for this request for
proposal (RFP), see the website.
Featured Career Opportunities:
California State Alliance of YMCAs – multiple positions around the state.
Tulane University, New Orleans, LA. - MSW Field Education Program Manager
Weekly wisdom, in their own words:
Real knowledge, properly used, will help anyone.
-Romare Bearden (1911-1988)
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